Many romantic relationships begin in the workplace. That practice will continue as people work longer hours in environments that encourage teamwork, openness, and familiarity. But sometimes those relationships can cause problems — particularly if they sour or the parties break-up —contributing to reduced productivity or lower morale or even increased claims of conflict and/or sexual harassment. If you're faced with this tricky situation, here are some techniques to consider...
- Understand the power of setting the example.
Office romances have occurred ever since men and women became co-workers, and have involved bosses and staff alike. A recent survey found that 30 per cent of managers acknowledged having at least one office liaison of their own; 74 per cent approved dating co-workers, and 21 per cent approved of dating subordinates. One of the biggest influences on office romances, and the ways in which they are conducted, will emanate from the examples provided by those at the top of the company.
- Respect individuals' rights.
Balancing individuals' rights to privacy with protecting employees from sexual harassment and the company from accusations of conflict of interest is fraught with complications. Indeed, it is the concern over claims of sexual harassment, usually after a romance has soured, that is a major concern about the company’s appropriate response to office romances. When you become aware of a blossoming relationship, you need to monitor the situation and try to pre-empt any problems. This could involve speaking to both people, together, right at the beginning. You may, for example, request that they refrain from public displays of affection. If, however, you don't consider that there could be a problem, stay out of it. It is a situation that calls for careful consideration, communication, and common sense.
- Consider possible scenarios.
When in bloom, workplace romances can take peoples' minds off the job causing productivity to suffer. Co-workers, too, can feel uneasy when associated in some ways with the romance; many informal communication networks are disrupted; break-ups can shatter more than one office relationship, and then there are the harassment claims that can result from those consensual relationships that go bad.
So there are three likely scenarios that should be considered. Your response to them is likely to influence your actions:
- Will the relationship affect individuals' and company productivity?
- Will the relationship affect the morale of co-workers?
- Could the relationship lead to possible sexual harassment claims?
In the worst-case scenario of these scenarios, you may need to consider what action needs to be taken.
4. Know what doesn't work.
Anecdotal evidence suggests that various forms of 'legislation' to outlaw romances in the office do not have a successful track record. Contracts of employment—sometimes dubbed 'love contracts'—are rarely legally binding, and asking romantically involved employees to sign legally binding agreements not to sue the company if the relationship breaks down is also a legal minefield.
5. Manage rather than ignore the situation.
Ideally, you'd like to manage the relationships in ways that maintain a productive, happy workforce on one hand, and not overly intrude on the employees' private lives on the other. This approach is a much better alternative to the traditional double standard that officially forbad relationships, yet didn't interfere unless forced to do so. If your motives are in the best interests of the company, those involved will appreciate your considered need to bring your concerns to their attention. For the workplace to survive staff romances, you must take a deliberate, reasonable approach in defining what's acceptable, and what's not.
6. Consider establishing a policy.
Although most businesses do not have written policies regarding office romances, this need not preclude you from involving your team in developing one. The main aim of such a policy is to deal with office romances while still maintaining a high level of office productivity. Remember, of course, you're creating policies regarding the private lives of adults, not lovesick adolescents. Ensure that:
- you don't place yourself in the position of trying to enforce unrealistic rules.
- practices are uniform and don't discriminate based on marital status.
- the misuse of e-mail is featured as part of this policy.
- all guidelines and policies should be reviewed legally to ensure they comply with relevant legislation.
- confidentiality is assured.
Any policy should be brought to the attention of everyone in the organisation and be included as part of any induction program.
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Disclaimer
This document does not constitute human resource or legal advice and should not be relied upon as such. It is intended only to provide a summary and general overview on matters of interest and it is not intended to be comprehensive. You should contact the HR Help Desk or seek professional advice before acting or relying on any of the content. © Wentworth Advantage Pty Ltd 2021